100 Different Silences

I have 100 different things to write about silence. And yet I am unable to put them in words. Its too profound, intense, deep and vast. I feel that there is no other word that is similar to silence that can carry so many diverse feelings either…

Maybe I should begin with those sudden hush that befalls a buzzing hall or class room and suddenly everyone can hear each others breath and you feel compelled to talk in whispers… but it sure ends in a burst of laughter…

sileOr the still silence that greets you when you are the first one to return home. It is rather depressing. Nobody likes to come home to an empty house.

Being an erratic insomniac, I am quite familiar with sleepless nights and the dark silences that accompany it. I can see the silhouette of my room mates and the objects, in a vividness that daylight does not render. Like these objects have a soul and come alive at light and are talking with each other. Sounds of the night.. the footsteps of people coming back or leaving for nigh-shift, vibrations of mobile, somebody talking in their sleep, snoring, somebody opening the door or a tap, heavy footsteps from the room above, whispers of a late night call, sniffling into the pillow, outside the band of crickets and bats and rats, the policemen whistling on their patrols, sending drunk guys home… The silence of the night is punctuated by so many different different sounds…

Or, for a difference, maybe I should talk about the silence that is followed by the declaration of a bitter truth. You can actually hear the other persons heart, trust and hopes breaking.

Everybody knows the companionable silence. And there is nothing more beautiful than that. But there are non-companionable silences too. The weight of it pressing your hart down and makes it hard to breath. I wouldn’t wish such silence even for my enemies.

There is also the pill of silence that you swallow when your loved one forgets your birthday. Holding back all those words and waiting and hoping that they’ll remember before the day ends. Ahh.. it hurts…! The silence goes on till the next day, and then you take cruel pleasure in their guilt as you remind them… hahahahhahaha…. I have actually done this…

The silence that floats in the air after the death of a dear one… memories linger on everything in the house…walls, a broken window, favorite pillow, their perfume…their habits and routine and their touch… scream to you something sweet, something bitter… A silence which will never again be broken by their laughter…

So many more…

So many things, which words cannot contain and pure silence expresses it all…


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